Sometimes, some people think they’re better off alone than be with a smoker. Because more than just a case of stress relief, pleasure, social situation solution, smoking is highly addictive, and often, dangerous for the health.
“Most marriages go through rough times, which can change the way spouses communicate with each other. Many couples develop bad habits and create destructive patterns when things aren’t going well.” — Erika Krull, MSEd, LMHP
Smoking may be one of the less desirable traits a person may have. It’s one thing to be in a relationship when both partners are smokers, but if one is not, then that may be an issue. It is as if there is no regard for your health.
In marriage, you get to live your life together with your “the one.” Are you honestly okay with your beau to smoke all throughout his life? Or maybe you don’t bother because you are a smoker too?
Here are some of the effects smoking carries for a married couple:
If both are smokers:
- You Are Intertwined In An Intimate Relationship.
We see it in movies. Couples already have smoking part of their relationship pattern, such as after having sex, after taking breakfast together, or when discussing problems. Taking a drag seems like a normal and “relaxing” thing because both of you do it, and you understand your partner in a way a non-smoker partner couldn’t. Maybe that also means you know the health effects. But what does it matter, right? There is romance in a good smoke.
- You Experience Less Tension, More Enjoyment.
A couple that smokes together is more relaxed and chill than the average couple. The couple sees the habit as a simple thing that keeps them both happy and contented. For the more “experienced” couples, they’re not just smoking cigarettes, but weed. They claim that it heightens the quality and happiness of their relationship.
“Your husband is responsible for his own behavior, just as you are responsible for yours. You are not “allowing” him to use and you are not condoning it either.” — Holly Counts, Psy.D.
If only one is a smoker:
- You Are Hurting Your Relationship Without Even Knowing It.
Smoking is a vicious cycle. “You smoke, partner complains, you argue about it, you feel stressed and get upset, then you smoke again.” For a fact, divorce rates are found to be significantly higher, at 76% to 95% if only one spouse has the habit of smoking.
- You Will Start To Look For Another Partner.
Whoever says vices can’t break a relationship obviously haven’t been in a serious, committed relationship. Some think that their beau’s conviction not to quit smoking is a sign that they don’t care about their health, and yours (secondhand smoke). It is an exceptionally challenging issue for a married couple because being in a marriage means you are committed to building a life together, not a problem.
- You Will Divorce With Your Partner For Fear Of The Future.
When smoking gets the best of your partner’s life, you tend to second guess if you even married the right person. It is a fact that smoking can be passed down through generations. It poses very harmful effects to a pregnant mom, and to the newborn child, who might experience breathing and nutrition problems.
“While it may be true that addicts need to want recovery in order to truly turn their lives around, the choice is hardly ever that simple and if we can tip the balance in the favor of treatment, or a better way of life, I say let’s go for it.” — Adi Jaffe Ph.D.
Marriage is a big step in two people’s lives. If smoking’s advantages outweigh its advantages, you are free to do as you wish. But if not, maybe try to change for the better for the sake of your family’s future.